Its a question that is often asked: Can men and women have a life long plutonic friendship akin to same sex friendships. Lifes little complications have a way of either pulling you apart or pushing you together, very rarely does something in between last forever.
Can a close friendship between hetro sexual men and women last forever? There are some advantages of male/female friendships compared to same sex friendships. This bond takes on something unique and allows either person to gain valuable insight into the thoughts and inner feelings of the opposite sex. Such a friendship presents an opportunity to better understand the opposite sex which can be invaluable in later life.
Same sex friendships are rare and very special types of friendships. Unfortunately there are issues that can ultimately come between you. These types of friendships can become very threatening to an existing or potential romantic partner. The thought of sharing personal thoughts and feelings exclusively with another person of the same sex can often cause problems and bring out insecurities.
What about romance within the friendship? Can you both remain friends without ever crossing the line. Will there be a magnetic energy develop for at least one of you. If such feelings do develop, one thing for certain is that your friendship is doomed. Those who believe they can continue in such a friendship and hide their romantic attraction are typical heartsick romantics who consider that honesty and sincerity will see them through until the end and that gallantry still has a place in the heart of the one that they love.
Its understandable why men can be lulled into thinking something more than a friendship could be developing. Take yourself back to a particular conversation that has taken place with a close female friend. Does something like this sound familiar? ” I’m so over not being able to find a decent man that doesn’t treat me like dirt. I wish I could just find someone that loved me for who I am and not who they want me to be. Where are all the nice sincere men” Does the man she’s trying to identify sound like you?
Long term friendships of this manner will often have two outcomes. The first is that the longer it lasts, the longer one of you will depend on the friendship, and the friendship aspect will become very important to you as an emotional resource. The second is that one will develop deep romantic feelings and sustaining the friendship as you know it will prove to become a problem.
If your romantic feelings for your friend have been discussed and its all out in the open, you then have a few options to consider. You walk away and try to move on or you pursue your friend for a romantic relationship. If you decide to pursue, the worst thing you can do is immediately try and push things too quickly, you both need some time and space to consider your options. A common approach that can actually work is to stop pursuing and wait for them to pursue you. See if destiny comes into play, this is something you cant force.
There are many friendships on the internet that develop this way. Online dating sites provide this opportunity for 1000s of singles everyday that are looking to meet and chat to other singles for friendship with the possibility of something more developing.
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