Category: Family Page 1 of 1272

Holiday gift giving ideas to save you money

It’s that time of year again, time for … … holiday parties, family, friends, … and of course. . . . … How many of you simply whip out the credit card and start charg

It’s that time of year again, time for traveling, decorating, holiday parties,
family, friends, relatives and of course. . . . shopping.

How many of you simply whip out the credit card and start charging every
gift you can find, only to dread the day when your statement arrives in the
mail?

Or are you one of the few that save a little every month just to cover the
holiday expenses when they come around?

Before you spend your money on the latest, hottest, newest gadgets,
take a look at these options that will really save you quite a pocketful.

YOUR HOLIDAY LETTER
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sending a yearly “wrap-up” letter to your family, friends and relatives is
a great way to save time and money. Instead of buying expensive
Hallmark cards and writing individual letters to everyone on your list,
why not design your own holiday letter?

When writing a “wrap-up” letter, remember this is the perfect time to
inform friends and relatives what’s been happening in your family’s life
over the past year. Even if something important happened in your life
back in February or March, some of your acquaintances might not have heard about it, so let them know.

After writing a rough draft, use your computer (or a friends) to help produce
an attractive letter. You’ll find programs such as Microsoft Word or Publisher with wonderful “wizards” that will walk you step by step through the process so you will have a beautifully designed letter in about an hour or two.

SIMPLE GIFT IDEAS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sit down and take the time to think about what each person on your list
would like to receive. Of course everyone would love to get tickets for a seven day Caribbean cruise, but very few of us can afford to spend that
kind of money on a present.

Here are a few ideas to get you thinking of all the possible gifts that can be easily put together without the need to spend much money.

Know of anyone entering college? Put together a “care package”. Fill it
with all the basic necessities a college student might need (or want).
Cookies, snacks, toiletries, wool socks, a new college student “manual”,
etc… Anything you think a young 18-21 year old student could use while
away at school.

Do one of your relatives work in an office? Put together an “office pack”.
The key is in the presentation. Find a suitable container and pack it with
office supplies, personalized pens or coffee mugs, magazines, far side
calendar, crossword puzzle book, etc.

CREATE A BASKET
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Have you seen the decorative basket assortments that are sold around the
holidays? You’ll generally find them in malls from such chains as Hickory
Farms or Sees Candies. Why pay $30-$50 for a basket of “goodies” that
probably only costs about $5 to put together? Put the basket together
yourself, save a fortune, and even add a bit more creativity.

You can find baskets (straw usually works best) at any discount store or
yard/garage sales. Then, simply line the bottom with a decorative cloth
(ie: colored bandana, checked napkins, etc…), organize the appropriate items
and trim/wrap with holiday decorations.

You can find all types of holiday arts & crafts ideas in books at your local
library or on the Internet. The possibilities are endless. Here are a few basket ideas to get you started:

Coffee Lovers Basket
Assortment of coffees, mugs, stirrers, creme assortments, Sunday comics

Cookie Basket
Homemade cookie variety, chocolate/fudge toppings, funny napkins, cocoa mixes

Traditional Jelly Basket
Small jars of homemade jelly, muffin/cornbread mix, spatula, butter & knife

Sweet Tooth Basket
Brownies, cookies, small jars of candy, cocoa mix, peanut brittle, chocolates

Pasta Lovers Basket
Jars of various pastas and sauces, Parmesan cheese, pasta ladle, strainer

Fire Starter Basket
Pinecones, long stick matches, starter blocks, candle scents/oils, ash shovel

GREAT LINK – http://www.stretcher.com/stories/981207i.cfm Here’s a link to great recipes on how to make peanut brittle, bath oils & salts, brownies,
potpourri and more for your baskets

Brownie/Candy Jars
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An attractive gift, perfect for friends, co-workers, and neighbors. A nice large sized jar filled with either brownies or candies. Attach ribbons or bows to the lid and decorate with puffy paint or simply glue colored pasta shells around
the jar. Again, be creative.

Homemade Decorative Cookies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Great teacher or babysitter gifts. Buy a cookie cut out pattern, add some colorful icing and a few ribbons with a nice card is a special holiday gift.

Framed Collage
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Perfect for any occasion, great for friends or loved ones. Gather pictures of the person you’re making the collage for. Look for pictures of various places you’ve both been and fun times you’ve shared.

Once you have your pictures, cut and organize them to make an attractive display. Glue them in place, decorate the frame and you have a gift that’s a lasting memory. How can you put a price on that?

Homemade Ornaments
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Get a recipe for a hardening clay from any holiday crafts book. A childs’ foot or hand imprint creatively decorated make excellent gifts for grandparents or relatives.

This is something special that you can only give once. Your kids will quickly grow up.

Family/Children Portraits
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An 8X10 of the family/kids is a perfect gift for grandparents or distant relatives you might not get to see very often. You can even make a holiday frame for it. Look for low prices at JC Pennys or Sears.

Magazine Subscription
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Who doesn’t like to read magazines? Reasonably priced, magazine subscriptions make excellent gifts. Find out what magazines or interests they have and then every time your friend receives another issue, they’ll think of you.

TIS THE SEASON . . . . KEEP THAT IN MIND
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All too often, the holidays seem to come and go in a flicker of an eye leaving us wondering if we even had a celebration at all. Take the time to visit with others whom you do not get to see very often. Spend time with the elderly in your family.

Start a ‘tradition’ within your family that everyone, including the kidsScience Articles, can participate in. These will be your cherished memories of the loved ones in your life that no gift can replace.

Article Tags:
Holiday Gift

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Gregory Thomas, editor and writer for the http://www.SavingSecrets.com website. SavingSecrets.com offers FREE money-saving articles, a FREE bi-weekly “Money Saving Tips” newsletter and even a FREE Ebook download titled “Coming Up With Some Xtra Cash” just for stopping by!










Article Tags:
Holiday Gift

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Gregory Thomas, editor and writer for the http://www.SavingSecrets.com website. SavingSecrets.com offers FREE money-saving articles, a FREE bi-weekly “Money Saving Tips” newsletter and even a FREE Ebook download titled “Coming Up With Some Xtra Cash” just for stopping by!

What to buy them for christmas a simplified approach

Got … you didn’t want last … Or the … before that? Well, you’re not the only one. They got stuff they didn’t want either. “They” are your … the ones you gave a

Got something you didn’t want last Christmas? Or the Christmas before that? Well, you’re not the only one.
They got stuff they didn’t want either. “They” are your gift-recipients, the ones you gave a stale fruitcake or a can-opener or that tacky multi-colored Christmas-themed sweater to. The same fruitcake and sweater that
someone, most likely, gave you.

You hated it didn’t you? So why pass it on? Probably because you just didn’t know what to get them. In today’s fast-paced world, we hardly have time – or
take time – to listen to what our family and friends really want.

Or we half-listen and think we’re on to something. Your wife complains the microwave is on the fritz all year.
But do you think she wants to find a kitchen appliance under the tree? And really, does your husband need yet
another color-coordinated shirt and tie?

So what’s a clueless gift-giver to do?

First, tune in. Listen to what your loved ones say they want, they wish for, they’d like to have someday.

Second, understand gender differences. Men and women don’t generally desire the same types of gifts. Most women like jewelry, for example, but only some men wear jewelry, many do not. Not everyone is the same, of course, so make sure you know the taste and style of the person you’re buying the gift for.

Third, don’t confuse personal gifts with business gifts. A man shouldn’t give a ring or “eau de sexy nights” cologne to his female colleague. She’s bound to take it the wrong way.

Finally, if all else fails, just follow this simple gift-giving guide:

For her:
Women want to feel pretty, no matter how old we get. My 70+ year-old mother still slathers on scented lotion and dusting powder after a bath. Bath and body oils or a spa basket, which can include fragrant soaps, lotion and bath gels are always a good choice. Or buy her one of her favorite fragrances. Many come in gift sets, coupled with scented lotion or soap. And please, don’t forget the jewelry!

For him:
Men like their toys, whether it’s a powerful stereo system or a new Ferrari. Of course, if neither is in
your budget you can always get him a high-tech gift such as a handheld computer from Palm, Casio and other
companies. Is he a golfer or into fitness? A new golf shirt or gloves, even personalized golf balls make
great gifts or stocking-stuffers. Men like personal gifts too, but know your man. Would he prefer a new watch, to a gold chain or bottle of cologne?

For kids:
Children change so rapidly from year to year, that it’s often hard to know what will hold their interest and keep them challenged. Make sure the gift is age
appropriate so he or she can play with it now. A pre-schooler will get much more use out of an activity center than an older child’s toy like Merlin. Give
them different types of toys so they have a variety of activities to choose from. In other words, don’t give them all dolls or all trucks. Add some educational games to the mix. And buy what the child likes. If he prefers a train set to racing cars, the train set will get used.

For mom and dad:
You can pretty much follow the For her/For him suggestions. But, depending on how old they are, you may have to age-up a little. An older woman would
probably prefer a more traditional fragrance like Chanel No. 5 or Halston to Harley Davidson’s Destiny. A string of pearls or a pretty brooch are always nice. If dad’s a golfer, a fisherman or enjoys some other activity, find an item he can use or something related
that’s fun.

For friends and others:
If you’re close to the person, gifts can be more personal: bath sets, clothing or accessories, a piece of jewelry. Give a business associate an organizer or a small travel case. Or you can give anyone a more generic present like a gourmet gift basket that may include candy, fruit, nuts or other food items. This kind of gift makes a lovely addition to any home.

AndArticle Submission, it sure beats that stale fruitcake!

Copyright © 2001 L.A. Nelson

Save on holiday gifts – most items mentioned in this article can be found at The Art of Gifting
http://www.artofgifting.com

Find this article at:
http://www.artofgifting.com/giftgiving.html

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

L.A. Nelson is a cable television marketer, a freelance writer and a member of the Writer’s Guild of America.
This article may be freely published on your website, in your newsletter, or in your eBook, as long it is used in its entirety and the copyright notice and resource information at the end are left intact.










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

L.A. Nelson is a cable television marketer, a freelance writer and a member of the Writer’s Guild of America.
This article may be freely published on your website, in your newsletter, or in your eBook, as long it is used in its entirety and the copyright notice and resource information at the end are left intact.

Heres what they really want for christmas

… to a new survey carried out by Alliance & where … one in five small business owners view tax astheir greatest concern. The … has … in hislast budget tha

According to a new survey carried out by Alliance & where ID_NUM=9270;
Leicester, one in five small business owners view tax as
their greatest concern. The Chancellor has announced in his
last budget that companies with profits below œ10,000 will
not have to pay any corporation tax with effect from 1 April
2002. The question to be asked is: does that announcement
make incorporation a more attractive option compared to
being a sole trader?

The answer is that from a tax point of view, it is
advantageous to trade through a limited company as long
as the income is drawn from the company by the owners as
dividends from their shares and the amount of dividends
drawn is restricted below the 40% band rate (i.e. œ31,063
for tax year 2002/03). That way, the owners have no further
personal tax (“income tax”) to pay. Moreover, dividends are
not subject to national insurance contributions. This is
excellent news of course. But, if dividend income falls
within the higher rate bracket of income tax (i.e. above
œ34,515), they will be taxed at 22.5% on the excess, which
of course will increase the tax burden. The company profits
are subject to corporation tax rates. Those are lower than
income tax rates.

The most catastrophic scenario is when the director takes
his reward from the company as salary. Then his/her salary
is taxed at income tax rates (like a sole trader’s income).
That is because, unlike sole traders, the tax system treats
companies as separate from their owners because a company is
a separate legal entity. The problem is that the income
taxes are higher than corporation tax rates. On top of
that, they will be subject to employee and employer national
insurance contributions, which of course increase the tax
burden and render his position worse than even an
unincorporated business (“sole trader”), because NIC Class 1
on payroll are higher than NIC Class 2 paid by self
employed.

In contrast, a self employed person (“sole trader”) is taxed
at income tax rates on the profits from his business, which
are added to his other sources of income. As it has already
been mentioned, income tax rates are overall higher than
corporation tax rates. On top of income tax, national
insurance contributions class 4 are payable on the business
profits within a specified band (7% on profits between
œ4,615and œ30,420). National insurance contributions Class 2
are also paid by self-employed people, although those are
lower than those payable by company directors on their
salaries.

To illustrate the above, let’s take a simple example. We
have a limited company and a sole trader. They both make
œ60,000 profits each in the tax year 2002/03. We assume that
the company director takes a salary equal to the amount of
his personal allowances (untaxed income) of œ4,615 and the
balance as dividends. The company will pay corporation tax
at 19% equal to œ10,523 and nothing else. The sole trader
will pay income tax œ16,542, National insurance Class 2 œ104
and National insurance Class 4 œ1,806. Total œ18,452. The
bottom line is that the person that has incorporated his
business into a limited company will make a tax saving of
œ7,929 compared to a sole trader! Isn’t that fantastic?

Somebody might be wondering: why is this entire happening?
The official explanation is that, this government, to help
the economy grow, encourages people to leave as much profits
within their businesses to be reinvested, instead of being
taken out and spent.

The “unofficial line” is that, as a matter of fact, for
years the Inland Revenue has tried to reclassify the
self-employed. The 1% in NIC hike on staff salaries above
the NIC threshold from next April adds to both the
employees’ and employers’ tax burden and may more than
offset the saving from the corporation tax zero rate on the
first œ10,000 of profits.

Aren’t there any other matters to consider in deciding
whether to incorporate or not?

Higher administration costs to comply with company law,
payroll and bookkeeping is one factor. Another issue is
pension planning. Extracting profits out of the company as
dividends rather than salary means that there will be no
“net relevant earnings” and therefore pension contributions
can’t be made. But the advent of stakeholder pension plans
has meant that contributions up to œ3,600 per year can be
made without the need for any earnings. If a person does not
wish to transfer funds in existing plans into stakeholder
because of high charges, there is a way out: the best net
relevant earnings (i.e. salary) in five consecutive years
can be used for making contributions for the next five
years, even if there were no salaries in the remainder four
years. It is comforting to know that entitlement to basic
state pension is not affected by taking a salary from the
company at the level of a person’s personal allowances i.e.
œ4,615.

Furthermore, an individual may decide not to bother with
pension plans and instead invest in ISA. Often, these can be
more efficient than pensions but that’s beside the scope of
this article. If that option is taken, no salary is
necessary.

Another factor is business motoring. It might be tax
advantageous for an unincorporated business that owns many
cars not to incorporate because if these cars have some
private use there will be benefits in kind taxed on the
users. These are generally higher than the straight
apportionment between private and business for all car
running costs in the case of sole traders.

The conclusion is that there can be considerable tax savings
waiting the sole trader who decides to go down the
road to incorporation. But, one needs to proceed with
caution and careful planning. And don’t forget the biggest
advantage of incorporation, which is Protection
from Personal Liability. Incorporating is one of the best
ways to protect a business owner from personal liability.
Shareholders of a company are generally not liable for the
obligations of the company. Creditors of a company may seek
payment from its assets, but not the assets of the
shareholders. This means that business owners may engage in
business without risking their homes or other personal
property.

Thank you for taking the time to read this Article. I hope
you’ve found it useful. If you have, please drop me an email
and let me know what you think.

You can email me at…

constantinesavva@accamail.com

Alternatively, you can visit our website at
http://www.tax-accounting-london.info and read a series of
other full length articles that present the complete picture
on a variety of interesting topics.

If you would like to know how to save tax and make sure that
more of your hard earned cash stays with you to expand your
business and increase your profits, we have a Free Special
Report addressed to small businesses either starting up or
already in business. This Exclusive Free Special Report is
available automatically when you subscribe to our regular
series of Free Newsletters on finance advice and tax
planning by visiting our subscription area on our website
www.tax-accounting- london.info. It is complied from real
life situations dealing with small business tax affairs for
over 10 years and it is loaded with down-to-earth advice and
practical, understandable examples.

LEGAL NOTICE
Whilst every care has been taken in the preparation of this
articleFree Articles, the author cannot accept responsibility for any
errors or omissions. Proper professional advice should be
taken at all times.

We retain copyright for the contents of this article. Any
unauthorized copying or onward distributions are prohibited
without our consent.

Article Tags:
Limited Company, National Insurance, Sole Trader

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

L.A. Nelson is a cable television marketer, a freelance writer and a member of the Writer’s Guild of America.
This article may be freely published on your website, in your newsletter, or in your eBook, as long it is used in its entirety and the copyright notice and resource information at the end are left intact.










Article Tags:
Limited Company, National Insurance, Sole Trader

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

L.A. Nelson is a cable television marketer, a freelance writer and a member of the Writer’s Guild of America.
This article may be freely published on your website, in your newsletter, or in your eBook, as long it is used in its entirety and the copyright notice and resource information at the end are left intact.

Unloved and unwanted

Unloved, Unwanted & Disowned Ever since I was a child in … I knew there was … strange about my mother. She didn’t seem normal, but at that time, how would I know what normal is? My

Unloved, Unwanted & Disowned

Ever since I was a child in kindergarten I knew there was something strange about my mother. She didn’t seem normal, but at that time, how would I know what normal is?

My brother, four-years-older, never seemed to be home. I have never had a conversation with him, and I am now in my late forties. He was never interested in getting to know me or including me in his life. He was someone I knew was there but my existence, and his, was meaningless.

We lived in the same house, but we were both more like boarders. He always was off with his buddies. I didn’t really meet those people until the high school years, but even then it didn’t matter.

Both my parents and brother were never capable of showing love or emotion. Whatever feelings they had, it only appeared in the form of severe negativity. My mother was always crying for some reason or another. She seemed to hate her life even though nothing at all was ever expected of her.

All my mother ever did was go in the basement and yell at the washing machine, talk to the cleaning woman at lunch and watch television. Her only goal in life was to figure out what’s for dinner and which room to clean.

She was obsessed with cleanliness. She sometimes would get on the floor on her hands and knees and scrub the floor. But she was never happy with the results. Everything was always dirty,
even minutes after it was cleaned, she felt it was dirty again.

It took me my whole lifetime to realize my mother and father were mentally disturbed. My parents both lived off the successful financial condition of my maternal grandparents. My father was a ne’er-do-well who made it from check to check but my grandmother willingly gave money on a regular basis for whatever we needed.

I guess since my father knew that, he didn’t try very hard. My grandfather tried to force my father and uncle to be in business together, but that was always volatile. My entire household was always volatile, with explosive temperaments coming from everywhere. Always loud voices yelling and swearing and slamming of doors and throwing of objects with uncontrolled, raging tempers. I was shaking a lot.

My parent’s have always had extreme difficulty getting along with people, and that was one of many reasons why they have few to none as far as social contacts was concerned.

My mother spent most of her life watching television. She always was ill from something or another. But her illnesses weren’t bad enough to keep her from forming a life her own. She simply didn’t try or was too mentally weak.

My parents doted on their son and he grew to become more and more selfish, inflexible, hostile, arrogant, money-loving, verbally abusive, mentally abusive, materalistic and more. He married a woman with the same qualities.

I had to be on my own emotionally and searched for attention and love outside the home. There was no love at all at home. My grandparents provided the material things for all four of us to survive. But I was empty, suffering from severe anxiety, depression, and zero self-esteem.

When it came time for me to finally marry, and I had had multiple bad relationships with men because I gravitated toward losers like my father and men who physically and emotionally abused me, like I was used to at home.

For once in my life I was with a man who could make a living on his own without help from someone else, who was kind and trusting and uplifting, and he actually cares about me. For me that’s a miracle. I thought I was doomed to sit in front of the television with the lights off like my useless mother.

They were not happy that I married. They gave me no gift and no wedding. Two years ago I had major surgery and my mother didn’t even call.

She’s had many surgeries throughout her freakish life and I visited her nonstop. Then my father became ill and I visited him every day.

But in the background their son was worried my husband would “steal” my parents’ home and his “inheritance.” My mother inherited money from HER mother. That’s what my parents lived off of.

Their son had spent so much over the years and accumulated miles of debt from his extravagant lifestyle, he constanly needs more and more. He found a way to get their house and savings.

Now they are elderly and living in his home because they have lost everything they have to their viscious son. And they have forgotten they have a daughterBusiness Management Articles, or they choose to forget.

They never paid me much mind anyway over the years. They thought of me as a useless drone who could possibly help take care of them in their old age but of no use in any other way.

I am now alone with my husband. But you know what? I am lucky to finally be free of the noose around my neck. I catered to their every whim in their old age demands. Now their beloved son has to figure out how to get rid of them as he lavishly spends their savings.

And that will be Part Two. Until then….

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Graduate of Kent State University, 1976 Over 100 published articles in the Journalism genre, meaning articles were assigned










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Graduate of Kent State University, 1976 Over 100 published articles in the Journalism genre, meaning articles were assigned

Friendship suggestions for feeling better

… improves … and abates misery by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.” – Marcus Cicero (BC) … amiably with family and friends is a super stress reducer.

“Friendship improves happiness and abates misery by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.” – Marcus Cicero (BC)

Interacting amiably with family and friends is a super stress reducer. Instead of our minds working overtime on worrisome problems, it is occupied with thoughts of other things and other people. There is less room left for anxieties and self-doubt. Good friendship is like good health – appreciate it while you have it.

“Life has no blessing like a prudent friend” – Euripides (BC)

“The only way to have a friend is to be one. . . A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

Getting people to like you is the starting point, and it should be fairly easy to do. People have a basic need to be liked themselves, and by showing your appreciation of them, they will return your feelings. Praise given out sincerely is a great act of friendship. Be kind, pleasant, calm, and a good listener. Try to see the good, not the bad qualities in people. Smile.

“The rule of friendship means there should be mutual sympathy between them, each supplying what the other lacks and trying to benefit the other, always using friendly and sincere words.” – Buddha (BC)

As a friend, try to let an unfavorable incident or remark fly right over the top of your head. We all blurt out something stupid or do something regrettable at timesFree Reprint Articles, and it’s so nice when the other acts as if it never happened. This is a dear friend.

“I destroy my enemy when I make him my friend” – Abe Lincoln (1809-1865)

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

This article is an excerpt from 32 KEYS A Collection of Ideas About Life by Ken McIsaac. Read the complete book online at http://modena.intergate.ca/personal/mci/32keys.htm










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

This article is an excerpt from 32 KEYS A Collection of Ideas About Life by Ken McIsaac. Read the complete book online at http://modena.intergate.ca/personal/mci/32keys.htm

Lose your patience not your anger

So when was the last time you lost your patience with your … To answer that, would you be looking at your calendar or the second hand on your watch? The problem with having children is that by

So when was the last time you lost your patience with your children? To answer that, would you be looking at your calendar or the second hand on your watch?

The problem with having children is that by the time you’ve learned everything you need to know to raise them, they’re almost grown. By the time you’re wise enough, you’re too tired. One thing I have to say about having children is that it makes you appreciate your own parents.

A frequent source of conflict between children and parents is that they do not think alike, much to the consternation of parents. For instance, I like putting things back where they belong so I can find them the next time I need them. My children don’t seem to have this same tendency. When things get out of place, I can easily get out of sorts. But after much trial and error, I realized that it’s not worth raising your blood pressure over a $40.00 power tool. Nor is it worth damaging the self esteem of your children (now that’s an overused word I bet you’ve heard before)! One way to abate the anger you feel from having your personal possessions and tools strewn out all over the lawn is to remember that it’s probably divine retribution going back to when you were a child and did the very same things to your parents!

In all honesty, losing your temper is easy. Some people seem to lose it a lot more than others. Incidentally, why is it that those who lose their temper the most always seem to find it again? Maybe it should’ve stayed lost!

Actually, losing your temper is the most counterproductive thing you can do as a parent. It’s admitting to your children that you’re not in control. But in any dispute between emotion and common sense, it seems that emotion almost always wins out. Maybe your best bet is to try another approach when things start to get tense before you vent your anger. It’s easier to maintain control of your temper than to wait until it’s unleashed and try to reign it back in. Once you’ve gone past the point of no return, it’s sort of like jumping off a house and trying to stop halfway. Too late!

Dealing with children isn’t supposed to be easy. In case you thought otherwise, your children will subtly remind you over and over again! There will be times that you won’t always know the best thing to do, especially when it comes to the issue of discipline. Unfortunately, children don’t come with instructions–if they did, you wouldn’t have time to read them anyway! Children, however, need some direction from you as a parent. And instruction. And because of time constraints, sometimes parents will skip over the instruction that children need and go straight to the punishment phase.

Regrettably, discipline is a part of every child’s upbringing, regardless of how you feel about it. No parent relishes the thought of having to discipline their children so we generally procrastinate doing so until we’re about to lose control. And that’s precisely when we need it the most. So, in order to act in their best interest, it requires that you remain in control of your emotions. Don’t be ashamed if you need time to cool off or to get help.

Now I don’t claim to be an authority when it comes to raising children but I’ve learned a few things from my own personal experiences–or did I really mean to say, tribulations. From my observations, it would appear that raising children is synonymous with raising your voice. Fortunately there is always help available, if you’ll just buy the latest book some expert wrote! Now, I’m not against ‘experts’ but have you ever noticed that they don’t always agree? Maybe they should all get together and read each other’s books? This way you’d only have to read one. I believe in consulting books and getting information but it always has to be in the context of common sense. After all, who really knows you’re child better than you?

Relating experiences about childraising doesn’t necessarily have to described in technical terms nor does it require a string of degrees to understand. In fact, the last time I checked, they don’t even give out a certificate for cleaning the bathroom floor after a sick child threw up at 3:00 A.M. in the morning. Not even when you had to be at work at 6:30 the same day. If they do, then I want mine! No, I didn’t get a diploma to hang on my wall nor did I get to walk across a stage with one of those square hats and a tassel.

In our primordial state, we balanced our feelings of frustration or anger by striking out in retribution against whatever caused it. But in the family situation there is no foe to vanquish. So against our invisible feelings of frustration, we sometimes subconsciously designate someone visible to be the foe. When this happens, we feel vindicated by subjecting our children or our spouse to being the object of our anger. This type of reaction only exacerbates a situation where others are depending on you to react in a mature manner.

In summary, you should correct your children because they need it, not because you’re angry or lost your patience. Instead of lashing out in frustration against your spouse, seek their support. In the arena of conflict and resolution, there is no foe unless you create one. But there is one consolation. Eventually you will get even with your children. Because one day they will have children of their own. And it will be their turn to appreciate you.

write about children, wives, financial affairs, relationships, etc.

Don’t know anything about raising children? Your children will teach you! The only problem is that by the time you’ve learned all you need to know, the kids are grown.

Losing your temper is the most counterproductive thing you can do as a parent

sometimes parents will skip over the instruction that children need and go straight to the punishment phase

No parent relishes the thought of having to discipline their children so we generally procrastinate doing so until we’re about to lose control. And that’s precisely when we need it the most.

Raising children shouldn’t be synonymous with raising your voice. In the arena of conflict and resolutionArticle Search, there is no foe unless you create one.

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jim Henderson is currently employed in the field of environmental regulatory compliance. He enjoys writing as a past time and has had several articles published in various on-line publications.










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Jim Henderson is currently employed in the field of environmental regulatory compliance. He enjoys writing as a past time and has had several articles published in various on-line publications.

The friend

“Nobody likes me. … hates me.” That’s the kind of thing that I used to say when I was a kid. “Well then, you might as well go eat worms.” That’s the kind of answer my mom would give me. Eat wo

“Nobody likes me. Everybody hates me.” That’s the kind of thing that I used to say when I was a kid. “Well then, you might as well go eat worms.” That’s the kind of answer my mom would give me. Eat worms? For crying out loud! No wonder I am the way I am.

See, it’s my mom’s fault that I didn’t have any friends—nobody wants to hang around with a kid who eats worms. I had even tried to tell her this well-known fact. Would she listen? Noooooo. Well, maybe my mom knew what kind of a complainer she had for a son, and just refused to put up with it. It’s possible. Difficult to believe, but possible.

Finding somebody to be your friend when you’re a whiner is hard—at least it was for me. It was even harder for me to keep them—my mom wouldn’t let me. “Find somebody nice,” she’d say. “Nice?” I’d ask. “Yes, your sister has nice friends. Why can’t you be like her?” That is why little miss perfect got locked in the basement.

By the time I could drive I did have a few friends, but only because they needed somebody to pick on. Poor me. They were better than nothing, though, and besides, none of them would last. It’s a sad truth. Time tests friendships, and most of mine have exploded into bits and pieces that I call memories, because that is all that is left of them. That road they call life is not much fun to walk alone, and though I know this, I still wonder why we choose to abandon one another along the way. Solitude is the regrettable prize won through pettiness.

Overcoming differences is one of the ways I have learned to measure a friendship. If a smooth path exists, I haven’t found it. The unspoken covenant is not for me to embrace every footstep that my friend makes, but rather to simply accept their placement. If I want the relationship to last, I have to be willing to offer compassion in the face of defeat, and, even more importantly, be willing to accept it.

Oddly enough, my best friend is a girl. We used to spend a lot of time together when we were teenagers and we even joked around about getting hitched and having ten kids—but it never happened like that. Looking back, I doubt that I would ever have gotten married if it weren’t for her.
From the instant I met her I knew that we were going to be friends. What I didn’t know was that this friendship would last. Within her is a sanctuary where my heart may speak and know that it is heard. It is outside of judgment and inside of laughter. There I have wings to fly after dreams without the burdens of doubt. A poetic place where failure cannot find me, for she has hidden it too well. When I am with her, I am not the person I know; rather, I am what I had always hoped to be. What more could I ask for?

The fact that we are both married now has changed everything about our relationship. No longer do we write or call one another with any kind of frequency. I have never forgotten what it felt like to be friendless, and I sometimes worry about how my life would change if something happened to her. No replacement could fill the break in my heart. I dare not imagine how alone I would feel. If you haven’t guessed, my best friend is my wife; they are one and the same.

The time will soon come when our children will move on and leave us with one another. What my wife and I have cultivated over the years goes beyond the boundaries of marriage. I still laugh when I hear that phrase, “Marry your best friend,” because I don’t believe that it can be done. It takes a lifetime to create a best friend. Best friends have scars where they have cut each other and healed each other. The proof I see in the eyes of the old, who have fired the metal of friendship longer than I have been alive.

The physical appearance of a couple that has remained married for untold years is but an illusion. What I failed to recognize for so long is how time has honored them. Skin soft and worn that hangs loosely is the reminder that they have resisted the pull of adversity. Weakened legs and swaying backs are not from age, but from carrying one another through difficult times. They are not deaf; rather, they simply understand that no other voice is as significant as that of their spouse. It was my ears that were deaf, for the whisper of their words speaks the language of wisdom. Our elders are proof of strength so great that even Death cannot part them.

Marry the person you love. Hang on to one another as you ride through all the ditches life throws at you. Don’t quit, and, God willingPsychology Articles, you’ll find what I have: a real best friend.

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Vic Peters is the author of Mary’s Field, a new Christian novel from Millennial Mind Publishing. More information is available at www.marysfield.com.










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Vic Peters is the author of Mary’s Field, a new Christian novel from Millennial Mind Publishing. More information is available at www.marysfield.com.

An examined life

Like far too many people I lived in and was raised by a family who believed the bottle and … was better then dealing with the “real world”, real problems and real … I learned to

Like far too many people I lived in and was raised by a family who believed the bottle and co-dependency was better then dealing with the “real world”, real problems and real children.

So, I learned to be: The Chameleon Girl, ready to change to conform to anyone’s mood, to leap to conclusions at a single bound, to become fearful faster then a rational
thought. I yearned to be something..anything special. I searched for the meaning of me..who am I..what do I believe. I did not know..could not know…was never given the freedom to learn how to explore the world, my opinions, my desires. To do that would be terrifying to my mother, father; it would have been seen as a denial of them, abandonment of them.

It was through me that my mother lived her life, and through me that my father found his comfort. I was confused and fearful. The only place I felt loved and cared for was at school and during Mass. It was there that I longed to become what I loved: A priest. I was crush when I could not become a priest, a woman preist. I felt lost.

In search of myself, my need to service God’s people, I went to college to become a Social Worker. I married my college sweetheart, we created four wonderful children: two boys and twin girls.

During my early years of marriage, and being a mother, I worked part time dealing with Family in Crisis. It was demanding exhausting work with little reward. I discovered that many of the troubles that were present were from how the families saw themselves and each other: It was the atmosphere that was created.

My own experiences as a child, my work as a social worker, and my disenchantment with STEP as a parenting technique; I came to learn how important it was for me to be fully human and more positive, and “proactive”, not just letting fate decide how I was to act about any situation, or let fear lead me as a parent.

Why the disenchantment with STEP? I believe that STEP, while having many marvelous things going for it, stops short when trying to help families come out of their destructive patterns. The emphasis is on the child, not the parent. Parenting is one of the most profound and intense interrelationships we will have in our life times. Far more intense than our relationships with people with whom we chose. These relationships are “born” from us. Many of us see our children as extensions of ourselves and that often gets us into relationship and parenting difficulties. Women who believe that their issues are dealt with find that parenting brings hidden issues to the fore.

What is a proactive parent? A proactive parent understands that that parenting is a relational activity, which the rules that govern relationships with others work here as well; just with the added twist that the parent is in charge. A proactive parent understands that children are like sponges and will react as the parents react. A proactive parent understands that to truly be the best parent she can be is to understand herself as completely as possible.

I became convinced during my working years and as a parent that many problems have a more spiritual aspect: A feeling of worthlessness. Mothers, women often feel as if spirituality belongs to men; or their own experiences as children has left them feeling as if they are unworthy to be anything other than, “a loser.” Because of my own personality, experience and understanding of myself, I went into formation for Spiritual Direction and created a ministry for mothers.

I have come back to writing late. When I was younger I wrote often, then stopped for many reasons. Now I am slowly coming back to journaling.

I learned that life truly is what YOU make it and there are rules to this game of lifeFeature Articles, and I have become a student of life to live it at my best.

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sonny Perkowksi is a woman who has spent most of her adult life explore and examining her life.










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sonny Perkowksi is a woman who has spent most of her adult life explore and examining her life.

Christmas countdown

The holidays bring back such … memories for me. But it’s notthe gifts I received that I remember so much, as the feelings of … and … I felt waiting for the … to a

The holidays bring back such wonderful memories for me. But it’s not
the gifts I received that I remember so much, as the feelings of
anticipation and excitement I felt waiting for the glorious
day to arrive. Back then, I thought the presents under the
tree is what made Christmas so magical. Now I know otherwise.

As I think about this, I want to teach my children to understand and
recognize the true spirit of Christmas. I know they feel just as I
did as a child and I want to make sure they realize that if those feelings
of anticipation and wonderment are wrapped with love and service, they
will have a magical Christmas every year.

This year I’ve decided to make a Christmas Countdown calendar. Any
calendar will do: one that you are already using or a printed or hand-
made December calendar. Anything that you can hang on your wall or
even set on your Christmas tree will work.

I’m going to write fun ideas or scripture verses on each slip of paper
and stick it to the calendar. Each night after dinner,
I will have one of them choose the slip of paper for the day and
read what is on it. Then we as a family will do the suggested activity.
Here are a few ideas:

*Write a kind note for someone in your family and hide it for him or her
to find it.

*Show your love for a brother, sister or friend by helping him or her
in some way.

*Show your parents you love them by helping without being asked.

*Sing Christmas songs with your family.

*Write in your journal about how you feel about your family.

*Work with your family to do something nice for a neighbor.

*Ask your parents or grandparents to tell you about Christmases when
they were young.

*Write a note or draw a picture to thank someone who has helped you.

*Make a list of blessings that make you happy and hang it in your
bedroom.

*Make Christmas cookies and goodies.

*Deliver the goodies you made to friends, neighbors and elderly. If
you want to make it really fun, deliver them anonymously as a “secret
Santa.”

*Go caroling with your family.

These are just a few ideas that can be used. You will probably come up
with more. Think of as many as you
can and start your Christmas countdown according to the number of
ideas you have (if you have ten ideas, start eleven days before
Christmas). Try to save a special activity for Christmas Eve if you
don’t already have a traditional Christmas Eve activity planned.

RememberHealth Fitness Articles, the idea is to spend time as a family and teach your children the
true spirit of Christmas.

Article Tags:
Christmas Countdown

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Shannon Jarvies is a WAHM with four beautiful kids and a great husband. She is also “webmom” to a site that brings moms together to learn, laugh and enjoy! Visit now at http://www.amomsjoy.com. PLUS she has finally discovered the secret to supplementing her husband’s income while staying at home with her kids. Find out how you can too at http://www.talkfreeamericainc.com/forprofit and contact her at kjarvies@amigo.net










Article Tags:
Christmas Countdown

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Shannon Jarvies is a WAHM with four beautiful kids and a great husband. She is also “webmom” to a site that brings moms together to learn, laugh and enjoy! Visit now at http://www.amomsjoy.com. PLUS she has finally discovered the secret to supplementing her husband’s income while staying at home with her kids. Find out how you can too at http://www.talkfreeamericainc.com/forprofit and contact her at kjarvies@amigo.net

To be an american

When I was a little girl, we stood in class with our hands held over our hearts and said the Pledge of … I never thought much about it as it was part of a daily … I don’t even think

When I was a little girl, we stood in class with our hands held over our hearts and said the Pledge of Allegiance. I never thought much about it as it was part of a daily ‘routine’. I don’t even think I comprehended what it meant.

Patriotism, until September 11, 2001, was just a word to me. I knew I loved my country and was thankful to live here, but being an American didn’t evoke the feelings within me that it does today.

Today, I think I know for the first time what it feels like to be an American. And I’m proud.

I am proud to be an American when I see such bravery in the face of incomprehensible disaster. I am proud to be an American when I witness strangers holding their hands out to one another and offering their hearts. I am proud to be an American when I see the American flag everywhere and I think to myself, “That’s my country — our country.”

And, I am proud to be an American when I see masses of people reach out to God together in prayer. Prayer for those who have lost. Prayer for those who are assisting and breaking their backs to do whatever they can to help. Prayer for our military as they defend this great country of ours.

I can honestly say that it took this terrible disaster to make me realize, truly realize how very blessed we all are to be living in this country. It also made me feel much more connected as a nation and as a planet. I am not wishing that this tragedy ever happened, so please don’t misunderstand. But, I was literally jolted from life as I knew it and suddenly realized what was at stake and what we lost. It made me value the United States of America more than I ever have in my life.

We are a changed nation — a changed world. I am a changed person.

We are reaching out to strangers when we may not have before. We cry for those we do not know because we share the common bond of being Americans. Yes, we are also fearful. But, through the thick fog of fear we are lighting a candle within ourselves. The candle of hope — and it’s shining brightly for the entire world to see.

We are sharing in our faith like we never have before. It matters not what denomination we are — what matters is that we are holding tight to the belief that God will get us through this and I see it every day. In candle light vigils. On the television. On cars driving down the street with flags blowing proudly in the wind. In public places where people are gathering to pray, unashamed of their faith and eager to display it. In store windows where there are signs that simply say, “Pray.”

“God bless America. Land that I love. Stand beside Her, and guide Her.” That song now has meaning to me, where before it was simply a song.

In the depths of my heart I know what it feels like to be an American and I do love this country and its people with all my heart. I ask God to bless us all, to bless the world, to protect everyone from acts of terror and destructionFeature Articles, and to once again bless America.
© Ellen M. DuBois

Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Ellen M. DuBois, MA – Ms. DuBois is engaged and has a dog who loves to critique her work. She is published in vol.2 of God Allows U-Turns with her piece, “The Angel in the Dumpster”. She writes to touch the hearts of others. Please visit Writings of the Heart, her award winning writer’s resource site- http://writingsoftheheart.homestead.com/index.html










Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Ellen M. DuBois, MA – Ms. DuBois is engaged and has a dog who loves to critique her work. She is published in vol.2 of God Allows U-Turns with her piece, “The Angel in the Dumpster”. She writes to touch the hearts of others. Please visit Writings of the Heart, her award winning writer’s resource site- http://writingsoftheheart.homestead.com/index.html

Page 1 of 1272

Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén